FEBRUARY IS LOVE MONTH
And as I do every year at this time, I’d like to share with you my keen, completely biased observations on the differences between how men act when they’re in a Cal Tort and how women act when they’re in a Cal Tort. Ready?
Pam’s List of Completely Biased Cal Tort Gender Differences
- A woman will rarely beat on her chest and declare she’s king after finishing a second burrito.
- A man will wait to see how much he spills on himself before he decides if he needs a napkin.
- Women look at each other when they talk; men rarely do, lest someone think they know each other.
- If a man and woman come in the restaurant together, the man will insist on sitting in the seat with a clear view of the door, thus ensuring that he’s at peak readiness to defend himself from the mafia raids that so often take place at California Tortilla—and that they get to his girlfriend first.
- While on vacation, you’ll never hear a woman say, “Oh. I guess we forgot to pack my clothes.” (Wait—that’s from my personal list.)
- If a man uses the 1-855-CALTORT number to cater a party of 20, he’ll order for 100. If a woman calls the number to cater a party for 20, she’ll order for 20. This has a lot to do with the fact that women are normal.
- A woman will use her Burrito Bucks immediately; a man will let them accumulate indefinitely, just in case he needs them one day. (I’m not sure for what–to pay the mortgage?)
So there you have it–my completely biased list of gender differences. Please, if you have your own, send them over. I’ll give a free burrito for the best ones–and in just one short year, we’ll print them. Yee-ha! Email your differences to me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
I FEEL COMPELLED TO TELL YOU…
That the Korean BBQ Steak Tacos are my absolute favorite special that we’ve ever had. And you know I’m telling the truth because since we started franchising our lawyer won’t allow me to lie. Before that I used to lie all the time. (Not about our food mind you–just about things that made me look better. Do you really think I own the Improv?)
Seriously, I love the BBQ Korean Tacos and Burrito–you have to try them. Commands the queen. (I’m not really a queen. This just in.)
Delicious Korean BBQ Steak Taco Combo
BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU (pretend that’s not creepy)
Every time you use your registered Burrito Elito card in February, you have a chance at winning a fabulous prize that’s good on your next visit. Fabulous prizes include free burritos, free chips and queso, free tacos—even free burritos for a year. Both your spunky cashier and your receipt will let you know if you’ve won. (Your receipt will whisper it.)
So don’t wait—register that Burrito Elito card right now. February could be your lucky month! Click here to register.
*Fabulous prizes have a 2 week expiration date—except for the free burritos for a year. Because you would hate us if we made you eat 52 burritos in 14 days. For additional rules click here.
SPEAKING OF THE BIG GAME…
Why not have Cal Tort cater it? We’ve got the perfect football food: the world’s best chili, chips and delicious homemade guacamole, burritos shaped like footballs (kind of) – you name it. Plus, we’ll give you a $20 gift card when you call the catering number and order for a party of 20 or more for ANY event between now and February 7th. Just call 1-855-CALTORT (1-855-225-8678) and say the secret password “FOOTBALL.” Spunky Cal Tort catering specialists are standing by. With helmets on.
For darn tasty catering options click here.
WANT ALL THE CAL TORT SCOOP?